The Confederate technocracy of Great United Columbia is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Empress Monika Habsburg with an even hand, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, complete lack of prisons, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed population of 4.357 billion Columbions have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, with Education, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Celeste mountain. The average income tax rate is 72.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Columbion economy, worth 810 trillion Natridiniums a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 186,042 Natridiniums, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Military strategists are questioning the wisdom of subsidizing the economies of sworn enemies, military equipment is being auctioned off to extend comatose centenarians' lives, the nation is well known for its rather dull and family-friendly architecture, and the freedom to be free is always just out of reach. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Great United Columbia's national animal is the Whale, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Great United Columbia is ranked 246,281^st in the world and 51^st in Arctica for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 46.16 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.